Twins at 21 Months Old: What It Has Been Like

As I write this, our twins have just turned 22 months old. We are quickly approaching the 2-year mark and I continue to be blown away by the rapid rate at which children grow, develop, and quickly become capable. A lot has happened this month. I have been humbled and challenged to grow in many ways. Let’s look a bit closer at what has been happening in our Montesssori home with 21-month-old twins.

Table of Contents

Making One-on-One Time a Priority

Some of my favorite moments from this past month have been the one-on-one time I have spent with our boys. Quite frankly, this seems like a necessity at this stage of life. Our boys are very sweet and caring, yet there are often many big emotions and challenging interactions between the two of them. Some days, it feels like they are continually pushing each other’s buttons, and this takes a toll on everyone. What has our solution been? Quality time one-on-one. Usually, it involves either my husband or I leaving the house with one boy. We always come back saying how easy life would be with just one!

It is these moments of one-on-one time that I am really able to slow down, guide, and allow their involvement in the way I truly desire, but is just not always possible with two toddlers. We’ve been going to the library, and the grocery store and just spending some special time in the kitchen doing practical life activities like peeling potatoes.

A toddler pushing a small shopping cart.

Moments of Practical Life at 21 Months

Here are some practical life activities and tasks our boys have been doing this month. It has been so incredible to watch the refinement of so many skills, actions, and movements from them this month. They are so capable and eager to learn!

Sorting laundry
Unloading the dishwasher
Wiping their face after a meal
Using a cloth napkin during meal time (this is so precious)
Pouring water from a small pitcher
Putting on their shirt
Peeling potatoes with child-safe peeler and supervision
Loading the washing machine with clothes
Using a spray bottle (this is an all-time favorite)
Checking out books at the library

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Potty Learning

We began our potty learning journey this month. At this point, I definately don’t feel like an expert or the person to ask about how to potty train twins. We also have paused our potty learning journey this month for a few reasons. It became clear to me that even though my boys were showing signs of readiness and I knew they were capable, I wasn’t ready myself. We are at the start of fall, the garden is wrapping up, we have a trip to Florida planned in a few weeks, I am watching additional children in my home two days a week and I simply haven’t read enough about it to be prepared for what this journey will require of me.

It was a humbling expereince. I learned a lot in the week and a half that we did it, and I don’t think I made a mistake starting. I learned that it will be more realistic to start potty learning with one boy at a time. It was challenging having two boys in training pants at the same time when neither of them was finding much success on the potty. Now, I know it is a learning process and I don’t expect perfection or for it to go quickly. However, I wasn’t able to be the guide I needed to be for them to find success becasue I was trying to do both of them at one time. I was spread too thin.

Lots of Grace

I had to give myself grace and acknowledge the reality in front of me. We’ve also been battling sickness for a while in the house and our boys are not healthy. They have many teeth coming through and it just seemed like it was time for a break and to come back a few weeks, or maybe enough months later, to try again. I know in the Montessori community, we see children potty training early, and I think I felt a little bit of that pressure to have them potty trained before they were 2 years old. There is a lot of wisdom to that I think and I know people find success with it, and I hope we can too.

Ultimately, I needed to take a step back and look at my children, their needs, and my capacity as their mother to see when we can support this new learning journey. I know it won’t be easy, but I also know that right now was not the time we would find success, because I couldn’t give it the attention and energy it required.